ZonderFann

last night my small group started a new study.  we will be going through the dvd curriculum of philip yancey’s what’s so amazing about grace?  we read a familiar story and one that philip tells in the book:

a prostitute came to me in wretched straits, homeless, sick, unable to buy food for her two-year old daughter.  through sobs and tears, she told me she had been renting out her daughter – two-years old! – to men…and made more renting out her daughter for an hour than she could earn on her own in a night.  she had to do it, she said, to support her own drug habit.  i could hardly bear hearing her sordid story….i had no idea what to say to this women.

at last i asked if she had ever thought of going to a church for help.  i will never forget the look of pure, naive shock that crossed her face.  ”church!” she cried.  ”why would i ever go there?  i was already feeling terrible about myself.  they’d just make me feel worse.”

the question in the study guide immediately following this asked: why is it so hard to extend grace in this situation?

the problem arises for me in the minor annoyances.  for instance, our neighbors are incredibly noisy.  people are always coming and going, honking their horns, kids screaming and being screamed at.  sometimes they have been loud enough to wake up our kids from their naps (which is always pleasant).  this is a minor and common problem, yet i feel more apt to show grace to the child protituter than my neighbor. 

my question is, why is it so hard to extend grace?  and how have you learned to be grace-full?

Jesus exuded grace – to children, disciples, prostitutes, and executioners.  for me, it’s not the fantastically awful people i have difficulty extending grace to, it’s those people who annoy me, or rub me the wrong way.  

what practices do you have that help you live more graciously?  how have you learned to extend grace like Jesus?

my wife and i have been reading through the bible this year using youversion.  we try to then talk about our reading at least a couple of times a week and have really found that it not only helps our understanding of scripture, but has really helped foster closeness in our own relationship.  this morning i was reading in ephesians 4 and thought it correlated with a meeting that i will be having later today with an author.  john h armstrong is coming in later today to talk with zondervan about his upcoming book with us (april 2010) entitled Your Church is Too Small: Why Unity in Christ’s Mission is Vital for the Future of the Church.  while this book will look at Jesus’ prayer for unity among all christians regardless of denomination, ephesians 4 also speaks to unity within the church, though primarily through spiritual gifts.

what struck me was the tie-in between disunity and immaturity.  many people see that the Church is broken when it comes to unity.  i never thought about it before, but maybe that points to our immaturity as christians.  early in our marriage, my wife and i went through some things that could have easily torn us apart.  but we made it through that time and have been stronger because of it.  we both freely admit that we would go through that again because of the unity we share now between the two of us now.  too often, it seems that people will leave a church and find a new one if there is something or someone they disagree with or do not like.  sometimes this goes so far as to cause a church split.  if we could try to persevere through the disagreements and such and strive to unify, God can make us stronger in the end.

having a 20 month old, i’ve seen the mindset of infants.  if jack doesn’t get his way, he whines and sometimes throws a huge fit.  how often do i do this in my church life?  if the songs aren’t to my liking or if i feel taken advantage of when i offer to serve, why is my first reaction to bolt?  i love my church, but too often my immaturity shows and i throw a fit and wish it was all about me, much like jack does.  what ways have you been able to unify within the church rather than drift or tear apart from christians?